Reflection

Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong – by Darcia Kunkel

November 11, 2015

Being wrong can be okay even for a perfectionist.

(This blog is reposted from Darcia’s blog site, Perfectionism Prism)

“For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.”
Psalm 139:13 ESV

According to legend, my mother got a call from my Kindergarten teacher indicating that there was a “situation.”  Apparently, when I had finished all of my homework (first one of course), I proceeded to go around and correct everyone else because they were doing it WRONG!   To say that I became a perfectionist early in life is an understatement.

Pyramid to successI was referred to as the:  overachieving, type-A, strong-willed, teacher’s pet, know-it-all, kind of crazy girl.  I happened to have passed those traits on to my children. Well-meaning adults will often tell me that channeling and re-directing perfectionism will produce all kinds of miraculous results. Perfectionism can push individuals to excel, but usually only to a point…then it will drive them a little bat#@$% crazy!

While I have tempered some of my tendencies, I struggle daily as a micromanaging idealist.  I want everyone to be educated on the best way to do everything, but it is usually my way or the highway. Most of my behavior was modeled after the long line of narcissistic perfectionists that came before me…. on both sides of the family.

My comfort (and hope for reform) stems from the fact that the good Lord created me, and knows how best to “channel” my inner perfectionist for His greater good.  In the meantime, I will continue to fight the good fight to be little miss CAN be wrong….occasionally.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,
plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11

Copyright Dacia Kunkel

Please visit Darcia’s blog sites: Darcia’s Delectables, Household 6 (for military spouse transitions), and Perfectionism Prism

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Darcia KunkelDarcia Kunkel is a former military spouse, mother of three (and a Golden Retriever), writer, editor and consultant.  She has a heart for military families, and writes on a variety of topics including military spouse transition, cooking, and the struggles of perfectionism.

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  • Carol Darby November 11, 2015 at 1:37 pm

    Oh Lord, can I relate to the above post. I, too, am a perfectionist and my oldest daughter is a prime example of my raising a daughter who is also a more perfectionist than I. She excelled in school, college, career, and being a wife and mother. However, my second child is also a perfectionist in that she just believes she must and can fix anything which may go haywire. The above Bible verse, ““For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,
    plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
    Jeremiah 29:11 is one I have depended on in my older years. Thank you for sharing this with me.

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